So, I was talking with my dad on the phone on Monday, talking about what an awesome time I am having here. I told him I love it so much and don't want to leave, yet I still long for home. I long to hug my family for an indefinite amount of time, I long to drive a car, to go an entire day without eating rice and beans, to have long talks in English with old friends, to go outside at night and not be afraid of being mugged, to be able to say something smart or funny without thinking about it for 5 minutes and then messing it up when I finally say it. At the same time, I love it so much here-part of me even loves all those things I just mentioned (except for being afraid of getting mugged). I have loved learning to and adapting to this culture, and truthfully, I'm kind of scared to go back to the States. I know I have changed and my view of the world has changed, while everyone back home is expecting the same old me. Not that I'm a completely different person, but there is no one back home who will ever be able to fully understand the experience I've had. I love it here and want to stay!!
After I got off the phone with my dad, I was journaling my thoughts about this. I wrote this sentence: "I know that, although I love it here, this is not my home and I long for my 'real' home. I need to accept the amount of time God has given me here, be thankful for it, then go where He leads me." Then it hit me: this is such a great picture of life on Earth! This is not our home, and although we love it, we know we will be going to our true home someday. We need to accept the amount of time God has given us here, then when He calls us Home, joyfully run into His arms to embrace Him forever.
It is also a picture of being in the world but not of it. I came here with my entire life's experience in the American culture. I had to learn a lot about the way they do things here, and I had to adapt a lot. Some things, I have been able to adapt to, while others are still very strange for me. As I have learned everything, I have filtered it through the knowledge that I have of life in the States. I have adapted to some things, like the Greeting Kiss, rice and beans, and the relaxed time schedule, while still keeping the same mindset I had in the States. I don't have to become a Tica-I will actually never be a true Tica (which makes me kind of sad)-but I can still live here in harmony with the people here. Just like, as a believer, I am in this culture but should always be mindful of the place I am from-and adapt to the things I can while remembering my values and beliefs.
I'm sure all of this sounds so basic and elementary, but when it clicked in my head I was so excited. I knew all of this before, but the comparison to what I am experiencing now was just what I needed!! I love it when God uses things like this to teach me-or reteach me-new things!! He is so good, isn't He??
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
1 comment:
oh becca, how i can relate to what you said! i've definitely had (well, and still have the same feeling). i long for the things and people at home, but in a way this too now feels like home, and it's hard for me to think about leaving. and i totally know what you mean about going home. while we definitely haven't had the same experience, i really think we'll be able to relate to each other in our experience like few others can. i'm so grateful and EXCITED for that. i can't wait to sit down with you for a huge hug and a long talk when we get back :) i really did enjoy your analogy too! i think it's a great metaphor and what a wonderful thing to be reminded of. well, i love you tons and hope your experience continues to be amazing! nos vemos cuando regresemos a gringolandia!
Post a Comment